Thursday, September 15, 2005

Guilty Feelings

I am Queen of managing to make myself feel guilty about many things. The case I am speaking of today is visiting family. The last couple of times I've been in Tennessee I have not been able to visit with my dad we have spent maybe one night and then gone onto Knoxville or didn't even make it by to visit. And Abby has barely seen him since we have moved to Indiana. This makes me really sad because I am so close to my Dad I would like for my children to be able to visit with him too. On our way back from the beach I had planned on going home by way of Chattanooga but, we got word that the part for my van came in and they were ready to fix it. The shop was in Knoxville. I knew Matt was ready to have us home and I was not looking forward to adding 4 extra hours to our trip by going to Chattanooga and then driving home. I also felt even worse because I had told my Dad that we were going to go home by way of Chattanooga so that he would have a chance to visit with the kids. I called and talked to him and he said he understood but I still felt bad and very guilty. Matt had told me it would be okay if I did go home by way of Chattanooga but I knew he really wanted us home so I made the decision to go home after my car was fixed. Today I got a call from my sister saying that my sister-in-law had her baby. I would love to go to Chattanooga to visit and see him but because of gas prices we just can't afford to do so now. I also feel bad because when Gabriel was born my sister-in-law was on her way to Japan and posponed her trip in order to come see Gabriel. They also came to see Abby when she was born. I am determined to go to Chattanooga at the first of October but after talking to Matt I'm not sure I will. He is very concerned about the cost of the trip. Though since Matt will be going to Mexico in October I think I may go during that week.


Mattdaddy said...

It's not just the gas prices that make these trips hard on the wallet. In total, your "free" vacation to SC recorded 600.00 in expenses.

I will NEVER tell you not to go see your family... and I believe I encouraged you to go to Chatt from Knoxville, but you wanted to be home just as badly as I wanted you home.

Mattdaddy said...
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carmen said...

I never laid blame at your door. I was simply stating the fact that I can make myself feel guilty very easily. Especially when there is really nothing to feel guilty about.